


drop our anchors in a storm

by MarchForOurGays



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Harold-They're making out, M/M, totally platonic cuddle buddies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-06-27 17:13:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15689817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarchForOurGays/pseuds/MarchForOurGays
Summary: Spock's hair smells of vulcan incense and Jim has absolutely zero impulse control.





	drop our anchors in a storm

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, how I've missed writing sappy Spirk. ;)

 

 

The quiet is unsettling to Jim.

He loathes it.

He has a love-hate relationship with the sound proof quarters he and every other crew-member sleep in. When he can't sleep -which, surprise, surprise, is most nights- he just stares out his window -he's the fucking captain, if he wants a window staring out into the vast, beautiful, dark depths of space and planets spread out like diamonds, twinkling in the light of millions of stars, he  _will-_ And thinks of all of the bad habits he's gained over the years of being Captain of the  _U.S.S. Enterprise._ And not like bad habits of biting your nails, leaving paperwork 'till the last minute, and dying or getting close to death so many times he can't even count on both hands. Bones chastises him for having bad habits and zero impulse control, like the parent Bones is, and Jim can admit that he can act like a toddler sometimes when he doesn't get his way.

 

But, honestly, the worst bad habit Jim has is about sleeping alone. Like he said, Jim hates quiet. He prefers, the chaos of crewman running around, Sulu and Chekov's flirty banter, Scotty and Bones arguing over which is better, whiskey or scotch, Uhura complaining about Jim finally knowing her first name, and using it whenever he can, the hum of the  _Enterprise_ under his palms and feet, and Spock's voice in his ear murmuring facts about what planet they're currently visiting, or to just tell Jim that he's five seconds away from vulcan-nerve pinching Bones and his confusing metaphors and dragging Bones back to medbay himself. Bones usually looks over Jim's shoulder to give Jim a knowing look before heading off the bridge to return to treating clumsy crew-members and passing out condoms.

 

Spock sometimes finds Jim wandering the halls when sitting and staring at the stars isn't enough. Usually, he's running another experiment down in the labs when no one's there, or he can't sleep either. Spock just shakes his head minutely at his Captain before walking back with Jim to Spock's own room. It's funny, Jim thinks sometimes. Spock finding him is now just a regular occurrence. One time, Jim falls asleep in Spock's bed after talking to him for hours about whatever came to mind, only to wake up with him tangled in too warm regulation sheets, Spock spooning him, and a strong arm wrapped around Jim's waist, protecting his captain from anything that dares to come for them at night. 

 

Jim doesn't mind the quiet then, as long as he's in Spock's arms. The usual mind-chatter dies away when Spock's slow, heavy, relaxed breath blows at Jim's hair at the back of his neck. Spock's arm tightens around him, pulling Jim closer to the extremely warm Vulcan body which cradles Jim like he's the most precious thing in all of the cosmos. 

 

Yeah, Jim could get used to this bad habit. Jim doesn't think Spock minds this either. 

 

Unfortunately, old habits die hard, and after Altamid and Krall, and all of that big fucking dumpster fire, Jim stops crawling into Spock's bed every night, retreats back into his own solitude, and just goes back to staring back out at his window again, or wandering the lonely halls. Jim bitterly thinks Nyota's happier that Spock's back in her bed, whispering vulcan nothings into her ear and holding her tighter than Spock held Jim. It almost destroys Jim at how twisted his mind can warp. Making Jim smell Spock's quintessential scent on the abandoned pillow next to him. 

 

Most nights Jim can take the loneliness, just staring up out of his window at the comforting sight of space before withdrawing back into his thoughts and the chatter that comes along with it. But one night Jim just _can't_   _take it anymore._

 

It's the night after an extremely stressful mission with murderous cannibals who looks like centaurs, and a short stay in medbay, Jim almost dying  _again,_ and Bones bitches about how Jim and Spock are off duty for three days and if they even  _think_ about stepping one foot on the bridge Bones will put the both of them in a medically induced coma for as long as he sees fit. Both Captain and First Officer wisely retreat back into their rooms for the next several days. 

 

Jim wakes up, of course, and stares out of his window for about five seconds before walking through the shared bathroom and into Spock's quarters and  _damnit,_ Jim's brain screams at him,  _go back into your own room you fucking coward,_ before Spock pops an eye open, seeing his Captain next to his bed, says absolutely nothing, but pulls the covers back as a sign of entry, and Jim greedily slips inside the rough, Starfleet issued dull grey sheets and  _fuck yes he's missed this_ before Spock's arm takes it's place along the plain of Jim's chest, pulling Jim back against Spock's bare chest as close as physically possible and Jim's mind silences at Spock's touch, almost possessive in it's nature but Jim wisely says nothing about it. 

 

"Spock," Jim whispers and  _fuck he really needs to control his damn mouth._ Ruining the shared silence between the two men. Spock gives Jim enough room for Jim to turn around and face Spock, the unfiltered starlight illuminating Spock's face and eyes and it pretty much almost takes Jim's breath away and  _fuck_ Jim hopes Spock didn't pick up on that stupid though through touch-telepathy and the fact that Jim realizes after all this time that he's irrevocably, utterly, infinitesimally, in love with his first officer. Which absolutely screws Jim even more than before. 

 

"Jim." Spock replies, his voice rumbling in a way Jim's never heard before, and it makes Jim's heart stutter just  _that much more._  

 

"I was just wondering why you were awake?" And Spock huffs at Jim's question, mulling over an answer in his head before replying. 

 

"I am usually awake around this time, for some reason, I cannot sleep," and Spock intertwines his legs in Jim's and they are  _so_ past platonic cuddling territory but Jim doesn't even seem to care, and it seems that neither does Spock. 

 

"Yeah, I usually wake up around this time," Jim breathily responds, Spock's face contorts into an unasked question and Jim's answering it before Spock can audibly ask.

 

"I have mind chatter, I hate it but,"  _it usually stops when I'm in bed with you,_ goes unheard, and Spock audibly takes in a deep breath.

 

"Jim," And Jim finds himself locked in Spock's logic-filled gaze, always watching, anticipating for the next action or response. Jim is trapped and he knows it, he's dug himself a monstrous hole and the only way out is to keep digging until he's utterly buried in it, and there's no way out, or try to climb out, kicking and screaming, ruining everything he's ever had with Spock, and Jim knows that's not an option. 

 

"Yeah, Spock?" And Spock's eyes darken from what Jim can see in the starlight of Spock's quarters.

 

"Please help my person refrain from doing something completely illogical." And Spock's grip becomes tighter around Jim's waist and  _holy shit_ _holy shit HOLY SHIT_

 

"Like what?" Jim stupidly asks before Spock looks directly down at Jim's lips before meeting Jim's eyes again. Spock lets out an inhuman growl and  _holy fuck_ _Spock's kissing me!_ Jim's mind screams before realizing how soft Spock's lips are, and he definitely will have a little bit of a burn on his face due to the barely there stubble Spock has, but Jim's laughing into the kiss, and Spock pulls back with unease in his eyes about why Jim would be laughing at a time and event like this and Jim smiles down at his XO.

 

"I think for once Spock, there is logic in the illogicality of an action," before pulling Spock back into another kiss and Jim can feel Spock let out a disbelieving chuckle before completely pinning Jim down on the bed in a show of Vulcan strength and  _oh god that feels fucking amazing_ Jim's body sings as Spock kisses down Jim's neck, leaving hickeys in his wake, above the uniform neckline, but right now, Jim absolutely doesn't give a shit. That problem can wait until tomorrow.

 

Tomorrow, Bones will come and check on Jim, only to find him completely naked in Spock's bed, with a matching Vulcan. Tomorrow, Bones will threaten Spock with any type of incurable disease he can think of if he hurts his best friend. Tomorrow, Sulu will celebrate his newfound winnings from the pool encompassing half of the ship by buying Jim and Spock drinks, and gifting Demora a new dollhouse for her fourth birthday. Tomorrow, Nyota will hug Jim with complete kindness, telling Jim not to worry about her past relationship with Spock, since a certain blonde nurse has caught her eye. Tomorrow, Admiral Christopher Pike will grumble about the amount of paperwork he had received concerning the personal relationship between a certain Captain and Commander before forwarding fifty credits from his bank account into Sulu's. Tomorrow, Jim and Spock will snuggle underneath the covers, and maybe fall a little more in love with one another.

 

After all, tomorrow is another day.     

 

 

 

        

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> A (1) in my Inbox is all I need in life.


End file.
